As I reflect upon Ash Wednesday, when many of us participated in the imposition of ashes upon our heads as a sign of repentance, I cannot help to feel both humbled and blessed. I have always found this service to be deeply powerful and humbling. It is a reminder that we have sinned and fallen short, that our lives are not what God intended, that we have more to learn and room to grow spiritually, emotionally, and relationally. The ashes upon our foreheads represent our repentance and our mortality, as we remember "that we are dust and to dust we shall return."
I do however, remember a distinct time growing up when ashes played a key role in my life (other than once a year at church). I grew up in old house built around 1880. It was a large house (think mock-Victorian) that was exceptionally drafty in the winter and thus exceptionally expensive to heat. My dad installed a wood-burning furnace to supplement the gas furnace in order to keep costs down. At an early age I learned how to split and stack wood through much practice. One of the by-products of burning large quantities of wood is accumulating large quantities of ashes. I will never forget the moment those ashes came to my rescue. I had gotten myself stuck in the ice and snow of our back alley. My '76 Buick Skylark was no match for 12 inches of snow and ice. My car was hopelessly stuck and all the pushing, pulling, pleading, and praying I could muster did nothing to alleviate my dilemma. I then remembered how my dad had once used ashes for traction in just such a situation. I raced to the basement, filled up a bucket of ashes, placed them under the car and I was soon unstuck. The ashes I thought were waste and of no value saved the day!
I wonder now if our lives in some ways are a lot like ashes. We go through times of great turmoil, stress, trauma, and pain. Many of us have been burned by broken relationships, betrayal, deception and deceit that our lives resemble a bucket of full of ash--used up, burned out, and left in a heap. What happens when we overcome and clogged up with the ashes of life? How can we be cleansed?
Create in me a clean heart, O God, and put a new and right spirit within me. Do not cast me away from your presence, and do not take your holy spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and sustain in me a willing spirit. -Psalm 51
Psalm 51 is a favorite of mine and at times has functioned like a mantra. Whenever I feel overcome with negativity, filled with doubt and uncertainty, the words of the psalmist bring comfort and solace. Life is dirty, messy and painful. There is no way to avoid pain, disappointment, agony and suffering. What we need to be reminded of is our deep need to trust God to bring healing and wholeness to our lives. Christ is our rescue, our strength, our healer. God can clean the mess up, can restore our lives, and bring joy.
May the ashes of your life not hold you captive, but may they propel you to a new place of healing, wholeness, and peace through our Lord Jesus Christ.